During the last four weeks I could watch myself falling into (very) old behaviour patterns over and over again. Somehow, I had lost my capacity to look well after myself before trying to get lots of stuff done or do good for others. How could this happen?
“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” – Walt Disney
We all are creatures of habit. Many of them are part of unconscious patterns and routines.
Finding out what you have to stop doing, what you can change and what to do right now, in the present moment, is the very first step in my Five Step Process to a Mindful Five Star Life.
This is paramount if you are a highly gifted and highly sensitive woman on a mission: fostering strategies and knowing exactly what to do to feel whatever you want and to be whoever you want to be NOW.
No one else can do that for you!
Once you know how to achieve exactly this, the second step is to make it a habit and the most normal thing in your life. From that place you will get greater results with less effort involved.
How do you want to feel now?
It’s simple but it’s by no means easy. It takes commitment and effort and patience. But you can learn it and it becomes easier the more you practice. The trick is to know how to treat yourself with loving kindness and at the same time also to know how not to make excuses and procrastinate.
Do you know what you do with you mind and your body to feel ‘happy’ or ‘sad’?
Do you know how to activate states like ‘feeling at ease’ or ‘powerful’ or ‘determined’?
If you are capable of feeling how you want to feel first – always – everything you undertake will be more effective. You as well as your clients, family, community will get more out of it, if you make it a habit to put your own wellbeing first.
Don’t wait for your wake-up call
I had a wake-up call lately, an accident with my bicycle. Therefore, I had to focus on taking rest, activating my healing powers and getting well again.
This is not what I wanted! I was full of energy and had worked properly only two days after my holidays. I was eager to move my business forwards. But this is how it was. I had the choice to accept my mind-body weakness and the doctor’s advice to not work at all. However, what I could do was to choose to heal as quickly as possible instead of ‘fighting’ my condition, worrying and making myself miserable.
Getting well again implied – of course (can you hear me!) – not trying to fix it on my own. I was consulting a doctor, taking the pain killers I usually avoid, seeing a therapist and getting whole body massages to relieve the tension in my muscles.
And (this is a big one) I did not go shopping or do any kind of home work for a while and delegated this to my full time working partner.
Why is being nice to oneself so hard?
Did you realise that I used the verb ‘had to’ – it was imposed on me to rest and take it easy for a little while. As I believe in the Law of Karma I take responsibility for what happens to me – or maybe it happened for me or through me? – in my life.
Nevertheless, I wanted to work! I wanted to contact people, write, do more sports instead of lying around. I wanted to organise my trip to Australia for next February, etc, etc.
Once again, I was reminded of what I preach: trust life!
We high performing, highly sensitive women can learn and practice to receive and to be pampered. Obviously sometimes the ‘hard’ way.
Put yourself first, now!
Most of us women were taught to put all the others first: our children, our loved ones, our clients, the duties… And we think or hold on to the belief that it’s selfish to focus on looking after ourselves or even out of question to put ourselves first.
And then we may get lost… and even end up in real troubles as I did.
The good news is: you can unlearn that. You can train yourself with new habits. I promise that once you get ‘it’, it’s real fun and you will see how not only your own wellbeing in your everyday life but also your results and your impact in the world change for the better.
Why not give it a try?
Please leave a comment below and share your experience with this. Thanks!by